So tomorrow is Thanksgiving. A time to be thankful. So please indulge me in the obvious. A post of things that deserve my thanks.
I don't mean to sound smug or condescending, but really, it's not my style to only give thanks once a year. I think it's important, and I vow to teach my kids the importance, of being thankful every moment of every day - and voiceing that thanks at least once a day. Our blessings are bountiful, and while we may not have the latest and greatest toys or the biggest and best house or the designer-of-the-moment stuff, we are rich in so many means. I have a wonderful, happy, healthy family. I, myself, am truly happy. My boys are incredible lights of joy in my life - and my husband is my love, my support, and my strength. The three of them - my heart, my soul, my love are the greatest blessings I could ever receive. I thank God for them every day of my life.
I'm also thankful for my career - for my husband's career. I thank God for the means to support and provide for our family. While we still may struggle to pay for the mounting bills that come with adding to the family, in economic times such as these we are lucky to be able to put food on the table. Did you know that 1 in 8 Americans go hungry? That is STAGGERING. Especially in a country of plenty.
You know what else I'm thankful for? My crazy extended family. My loco friends. My co-workers, my clients. Because they support me, they make me laugh, they make me cry. They make me, ME. I am the sum of my experiences and interactions...and enriched by all those I encounter. So to all of you, thanks.
I hope that this Thanksgiving season finds you and yours well - and well blessed. In the spirit of giving and giving thanks, I'll link you to my post from last year - all the organizations are still there and still struggling to meet demand, even moreso now.
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Sunday, November 23, 2008
I was duped...
When the Babe was born, I could hardly believe how much he slept. VAST difference from the Kid, who woke every 20 minutes. Holy sleep deprivation, Batman! But with the Babe, I had to wake him for feedings, which was SO new to us. I hovered over his bassinet for fear he wasn't breathing - he slept that long and heavily. He would regularly sleep for 3-4 hours at a time. And was sleeping "through the night" (actually sleeping 6+ hours at night) by 6 weeks old. I *almost* felt guilty about it.
But now, at 4 months old, the Babe (and me, obviously) is waking every two hours. HE'S KILLING ME! It's 6:00am and I'm writing this post. Now, being awake at 6:00am is not too bad. But it is when you were up at 2:00am. And 4:00am. And 5:00am. SOMEONE STOP THE MADNESS.
But now, at 4 months old, the Babe (and me, obviously) is waking every two hours. HE'S KILLING ME! It's 6:00am and I'm writing this post. Now, being awake at 6:00am is not too bad. But it is when you were up at 2:00am. And 4:00am. And 5:00am. SOMEONE STOP THE MADNESS.
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Some photo sharing
It's been a while since I've used my blog to brag about my kids...but seriously, they are cute. Here are photos from the past few months - as I realized I never posted any of my maternity period, the birth of the babe, or the kidlets together. So without further ado...
Maternity photos - these were taken by a good friend of ours who happens to be a great photographer. Taken in May, 2008:
Love this photo...but it looks like the Kid is kicking the Babe...
Ahh...much better. Brotherly love starts early.
And then there were four...
My boys. My lazy, lazy, boys. My entire world on one queen-sized bed.
Some pictures taken by our photographer friend (same one that took the maternity photos above). The Kid is about 41 months (3 years, 5 months old) and the Babe is about 3 months old:
Maternity photos - these were taken by a good friend of ours who happens to be a great photographer. Taken in May, 2008:
Love this photo...but it looks like the Kid is kicking the Babe...
Ahh...much better. Brotherly love starts early.
And then there were four...
My boys. My lazy, lazy, boys. My entire world on one queen-sized bed.
Some pictures taken by our photographer friend (same one that took the maternity photos above). The Kid is about 41 months (3 years, 5 months old) and the Babe is about 3 months old:
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Keith takes the words right out of my mouth...
Although I could not ever imagine being as eloquent.
A disclaimer here - I realize that some of you reading this blog may not agree with me. That's ok. Feel free to flame away. I would never take away YOUR right to do so.
A bit of background here. Earlier this year, the California Supreme Court, in an impeccably written decision, acknowledged the rights of same-sex couples to marry. They acknowledged it as a CIVIL RIGHT. One that would declare any law suppressing such right unconstitutional. I read a lot of legal decisions in my line of work, and I have to tell you, they were prudent yet clear in their logic. They eschewed reference to morality and religion, as well they should. The decision focused on a singular idea - the recognition that an individual's capacity to establish a loving and long-term committed relationship with another person and responsibly to care for and raise children does not depend upon the individual's sexual orientation. Chief Justice Ronald George stated in his majority opinion, "An individual's sexual orientation -- like a person's race or gender -- does not constitute a legitimate basis upon which to deny or withhold legal rights."
The words from Chief Justice George is what is at the heart of the issue for me. Yes, I have close family members who are gay. I have good friends that are gay. But regardless of that, laws outlawing ANY INDIVIDUAL'S right to marry are discriminatory. It is as simple as that. What's the difference between disallowing same-sex marriage and bi-racial marriage? Not that long ago, I would not have been able to marry my caucasian husband. I look at my BEAUTIFUL children and they would not be here if laws like these were NOT declared discriminatory. It's not about religion, morality and the like. It's about LOVE.
So last week, while I was elated with the result of the Presidential Election, I was angered and enraged that the voters of the state of California overturned this decision and rallied to steal BASIC CIVIL RIGHTS from same-sex couples. The campaign run in support of Propostion 8 (the proposition that overturned the Supreme Court decision) was shameful. Some crap about schools teaching kids that men could marry men and what not. Bullshit. You're going to try and get to my vote by scaring me about my KIDS?! And what they might (even though they WOULDN'T) be taught in school? Look, parenting is tough. I get that. But you know what's EASY? Teaching kids YOUR family values and YOUR family beliefs. You don't have to believe that homosexuality is morally "right". You don't have to instill values in your children about homosexuality. What you teach in your home is your business. I'm not going to encroach upon that. So why block another person's pursuit of happiness? Why insist that someone that they cannot have what you have?
It sincerely disheartens me. The whole situation. Because as a parent, when I look at these laws, these decisions, these referendums, propositions, etc., my first and foremost thoughts are of my children. One of my sons may be gay. Both of my sons may be gay. How could I look at them and tell them, "well, you can be grow to be happy...but only to an extent."? We need to fight for the rights of ALL, because you never know if the "someone" they are taking rights from is you...or the one that you love.
But Keith Olberman says it all in this video clip. Love him or hate him, he took the words right out of my mouth. Can I get a what, what?
Editing - you know, this is such an important issue to me that I'm going to post the text of my man Keith's commentary. Just because when my kids read this years from now, video may be dead. LOL. Skip over this if you've already watched the video...
Finally tonight as promised, a Special Comment on the passage, last week, of Proposition Eight in California, which rescinded the right of same-sex couples to marry, and tilted the balance on this issue, from coast to coast.
Some parameters, as preface. This isn't about yelling, and this isn't about politics, and this isn't really just about Prop-8. And I don't have a personal investment in this: I'm not gay, I had to strain to think of one member of even my very extended family who is, I have no personal stories of close friends or colleagues fighting the prejudice that still pervades their lives.
And yet to me this vote is horrible. Horrible. Because this isn't about yelling, and this isn't about politics. This is about the human heart, and if that sounds corny, so be it.
If you voted for this Proposition or support those who did or the sentiment they expressed, I have some questions, because, truly, I do not understand. Why does this matter to you? What is it to you? In a time of impermanence and fly-by-night relationships, these people over here want the same chance at permanence and happiness that is your option. They don't want to deny you yours. They don't want to take anything away from you. They want what you want—a chance to be a little less alone in the world.
Only now you are saying to them—no. You can't have it on these terms. Maybe something similar. If they behave. If they don't cause too much trouble. You'll even give them all the same legal rights—even as you're taking away the legal right, which they already had. A world around them, still anchored in love and marriage, and you are saying, no, you can't marry. What if somebody passed a law that said you couldn't marry?
I keep hearing this term "re-defining" marriage. If this country hadn't re-defined marriage, black people still couldn't marry white people. Sixteen states had laws on the books which made that illegal in 1967. 1967.
The parents of the President-Elect of the United States couldn't have married in nearly one third of the states of the country their son grew up to lead. But it's worse than that. If this country had not "re-defined" marriage, some black people still couldn't marry black people. It is one of the most overlooked and cruelest parts of our sad story of slavery. Marriages were not legally recognized, if the people were slaves. Since slaves were property, they could not legally be husband and wife, or mother and child. Their marriage vows were different: not "Until Death, Do You Part," but "Until Death or Distance, Do You Part." Marriages among slaves were not legally recognized.
You know, just like marriages today in California are not legally recognized, if the people are gay.
And uncountable in our history are the number of men and women, forced by society into marrying the opposite sex, in sham marriages, or marriages of convenience, or just marriages of not knowing, centuries of men and women who have lived their lives in shame and unhappiness, and who have, through a lie to themselves or others, broken countless other lives, of spouses and children, all because we said a man couldn't marry another man, or a woman couldn't marry another woman. The sanctity of marriage.
How many marriages like that have there been and how on earth do they increase the "sanctity" of marriage rather than render the term, meaningless?
What is this, to you? Nobody is asking you to embrace their expression of love. But don't you, as human beings, have to embrace... that love? The world is barren enough.
It is stacked against love, and against hope, and against those very few and precious emotions that enable us to go forward. Your marriage only stands a 50-50 chance of lasting, no matter how much you feel and how hard you work.
And here are people overjoyed at the prospect of just that chance, and that work, just for the hope of having that feeling. With so much hate in the world, with so much meaningless division, and people pitted against people for no good reason, this is what your religion tells you to do? With your experience of life and this world and all its sadnesses, this is what your conscience tells you to do?
With your knowledge that life, with endless vigor, seems to tilt the playing field on which we all live, in favor of unhappiness and hate... this is what your heart tells you to do? You want to sanctify marriage? You want to honor your God and the universal love you believe he represents? Then Spread happiness—this tiny, symbolic, semantical grain of happiness—share it with all those who seek it. Quote me anything from your religious leader or book of choice telling you to stand against this. And then tell me how you can believe both that statement and another statement, another one which reads only "do unto others as you would have them do unto you."
You are asked now, by your country, and perhaps by your creator, to stand on one side or another. You are asked now to stand, not on a question of politics, not on a question of religion, not on a question of gay or straight. You are asked now to stand, on a question of love. All you need do is stand, and let the tiny ember of love meet its own fate.
You don't have to help it, you don't have it applaud it, you don't have to fight for it. Just don't put it out. Just don't extinguish it. Because while it may at first look like that love is between two people you don't know and you don't understand and maybe you don't even want to know. It is, in fact, the ember of your love, for your fellow person just because this is the only world we have. And the other guy counts, too.
This is the second time in ten days I find myself concluding by turning to, of all things, the closing plea for mercy by Clarence Darrow in a murder trial.
But what he said, fits what is really at the heart of this:
"I was reading last night of the aspiration of the old Persian poet, Omar-Khayyam," he told the judge. It appealed to me as the highest that I can vision. I wish it was in my heart, and I wish it was in the hearts of all: So I be written in the Book of Love; I do not care about that Book above. Erase my name, or write it as you will, So I be written in the Book of Love."
A disclaimer here - I realize that some of you reading this blog may not agree with me. That's ok. Feel free to flame away. I would never take away YOUR right to do so.
A bit of background here. Earlier this year, the California Supreme Court, in an impeccably written decision, acknowledged the rights of same-sex couples to marry. They acknowledged it as a CIVIL RIGHT. One that would declare any law suppressing such right unconstitutional. I read a lot of legal decisions in my line of work, and I have to tell you, they were prudent yet clear in their logic. They eschewed reference to morality and religion, as well they should. The decision focused on a singular idea - the recognition that an individual's capacity to establish a loving and long-term committed relationship with another person and responsibly to care for and raise children does not depend upon the individual's sexual orientation. Chief Justice Ronald George stated in his majority opinion, "An individual's sexual orientation -- like a person's race or gender -- does not constitute a legitimate basis upon which to deny or withhold legal rights."
The words from Chief Justice George is what is at the heart of the issue for me. Yes, I have close family members who are gay. I have good friends that are gay. But regardless of that, laws outlawing ANY INDIVIDUAL'S right to marry are discriminatory. It is as simple as that. What's the difference between disallowing same-sex marriage and bi-racial marriage? Not that long ago, I would not have been able to marry my caucasian husband. I look at my BEAUTIFUL children and they would not be here if laws like these were NOT declared discriminatory. It's not about religion, morality and the like. It's about LOVE.
So last week, while I was elated with the result of the Presidential Election, I was angered and enraged that the voters of the state of California overturned this decision and rallied to steal BASIC CIVIL RIGHTS from same-sex couples. The campaign run in support of Propostion 8 (the proposition that overturned the Supreme Court decision) was shameful. Some crap about schools teaching kids that men could marry men and what not. Bullshit. You're going to try and get to my vote by scaring me about my KIDS?! And what they might (even though they WOULDN'T) be taught in school? Look, parenting is tough. I get that. But you know what's EASY? Teaching kids YOUR family values and YOUR family beliefs. You don't have to believe that homosexuality is morally "right". You don't have to instill values in your children about homosexuality. What you teach in your home is your business. I'm not going to encroach upon that. So why block another person's pursuit of happiness? Why insist that someone that they cannot have what you have?
It sincerely disheartens me. The whole situation. Because as a parent, when I look at these laws, these decisions, these referendums, propositions, etc., my first and foremost thoughts are of my children. One of my sons may be gay. Both of my sons may be gay. How could I look at them and tell them, "well, you can be grow to be happy...but only to an extent."? We need to fight for the rights of ALL, because you never know if the "someone" they are taking rights from is you...or the one that you love.
But Keith Olberman says it all in this video clip. Love him or hate him, he took the words right out of my mouth. Can I get a what, what?
Editing - you know, this is such an important issue to me that I'm going to post the text of my man Keith's commentary. Just because when my kids read this years from now, video may be dead. LOL. Skip over this if you've already watched the video...
Finally tonight as promised, a Special Comment on the passage, last week, of Proposition Eight in California, which rescinded the right of same-sex couples to marry, and tilted the balance on this issue, from coast to coast.
Some parameters, as preface. This isn't about yelling, and this isn't about politics, and this isn't really just about Prop-8. And I don't have a personal investment in this: I'm not gay, I had to strain to think of one member of even my very extended family who is, I have no personal stories of close friends or colleagues fighting the prejudice that still pervades their lives.
And yet to me this vote is horrible. Horrible. Because this isn't about yelling, and this isn't about politics. This is about the human heart, and if that sounds corny, so be it.
If you voted for this Proposition or support those who did or the sentiment they expressed, I have some questions, because, truly, I do not understand. Why does this matter to you? What is it to you? In a time of impermanence and fly-by-night relationships, these people over here want the same chance at permanence and happiness that is your option. They don't want to deny you yours. They don't want to take anything away from you. They want what you want—a chance to be a little less alone in the world.
Only now you are saying to them—no. You can't have it on these terms. Maybe something similar. If they behave. If they don't cause too much trouble. You'll even give them all the same legal rights—even as you're taking away the legal right, which they already had. A world around them, still anchored in love and marriage, and you are saying, no, you can't marry. What if somebody passed a law that said you couldn't marry?
I keep hearing this term "re-defining" marriage. If this country hadn't re-defined marriage, black people still couldn't marry white people. Sixteen states had laws on the books which made that illegal in 1967. 1967.
The parents of the President-Elect of the United States couldn't have married in nearly one third of the states of the country their son grew up to lead. But it's worse than that. If this country had not "re-defined" marriage, some black people still couldn't marry black people. It is one of the most overlooked and cruelest parts of our sad story of slavery. Marriages were not legally recognized, if the people were slaves. Since slaves were property, they could not legally be husband and wife, or mother and child. Their marriage vows were different: not "Until Death, Do You Part," but "Until Death or Distance, Do You Part." Marriages among slaves were not legally recognized.
You know, just like marriages today in California are not legally recognized, if the people are gay.
And uncountable in our history are the number of men and women, forced by society into marrying the opposite sex, in sham marriages, or marriages of convenience, or just marriages of not knowing, centuries of men and women who have lived their lives in shame and unhappiness, and who have, through a lie to themselves or others, broken countless other lives, of spouses and children, all because we said a man couldn't marry another man, or a woman couldn't marry another woman. The sanctity of marriage.
How many marriages like that have there been and how on earth do they increase the "sanctity" of marriage rather than render the term, meaningless?
What is this, to you? Nobody is asking you to embrace their expression of love. But don't you, as human beings, have to embrace... that love? The world is barren enough.
It is stacked against love, and against hope, and against those very few and precious emotions that enable us to go forward. Your marriage only stands a 50-50 chance of lasting, no matter how much you feel and how hard you work.
And here are people overjoyed at the prospect of just that chance, and that work, just for the hope of having that feeling. With so much hate in the world, with so much meaningless division, and people pitted against people for no good reason, this is what your religion tells you to do? With your experience of life and this world and all its sadnesses, this is what your conscience tells you to do?
With your knowledge that life, with endless vigor, seems to tilt the playing field on which we all live, in favor of unhappiness and hate... this is what your heart tells you to do? You want to sanctify marriage? You want to honor your God and the universal love you believe he represents? Then Spread happiness—this tiny, symbolic, semantical grain of happiness—share it with all those who seek it. Quote me anything from your religious leader or book of choice telling you to stand against this. And then tell me how you can believe both that statement and another statement, another one which reads only "do unto others as you would have them do unto you."
You are asked now, by your country, and perhaps by your creator, to stand on one side or another. You are asked now to stand, not on a question of politics, not on a question of religion, not on a question of gay or straight. You are asked now to stand, on a question of love. All you need do is stand, and let the tiny ember of love meet its own fate.
You don't have to help it, you don't have it applaud it, you don't have to fight for it. Just don't put it out. Just don't extinguish it. Because while it may at first look like that love is between two people you don't know and you don't understand and maybe you don't even want to know. It is, in fact, the ember of your love, for your fellow person just because this is the only world we have. And the other guy counts, too.
This is the second time in ten days I find myself concluding by turning to, of all things, the closing plea for mercy by Clarence Darrow in a murder trial.
But what he said, fits what is really at the heart of this:
"I was reading last night of the aspiration of the old Persian poet, Omar-Khayyam," he told the judge. It appealed to me as the highest that I can vision. I wish it was in my heart, and I wish it was in the hearts of all: So I be written in the Book of Love; I do not care about that Book above. Erase my name, or write it as you will, So I be written in the Book of Love."
Monday, November 10, 2008
A year ago today...
I began blogging. Truth be told, I suck at blogging as I can't seem to keep up, but I try. I ventured into this online experiment to capture the craziness of my every day life - if only as a veiled attempt to sharpen my weakened mommy brain. I meant it seize the hilarity of babe and toddlerhood...and to prove to my kids that mommy didn't make this shit up. (apologies to those of you who don't realize that I swear like a trucker - and my apologies to truckers everywhere for the sweeping generalization)
Anyway, it seems that I may have strayed from my original intentions. As I look back on a year of posts, it seems that this is not all about the funny things my kids say or do, but more about me. More about my thoughts, hopes, and other opinions that I want to pass on to my children. Like they don't hear enough about them. ;-)
That's ok. I've evolved. The blog has evolved. I want my kids to know that I'm not just mommy. When they are old enough to read and understand these words, I want them to know that mommy isn't just all about nagging them to wash their hands, or bugging them about their days at school...but that mommy has arbitrary thoughts, irrational fears, imprudent feelings and grandiose hopes. That mommy is, unbeknown to them, HUMAN.
And thanks to everyone who takes time to read this blog. Because really, why do so? I'm not that interesting. :P Most of all, thanks to my mommy friends that read and "talk" with me. You gals keep it real. Keep on keepin' on, mamas.
Although...as I celebrate my "blog-iversary" (I just made that up), I did want to share a memory that I will cherish forever...so I better write it down before I forget.
A month or so ago, I'm driving the kid to preschool. Well, every morning, we say prayers to thank God for all the blessings he brings in our lives. Our usual M.O. is that the kid starts off with a list of things that he is thankful for...it usually includes whatever he is holding in his hands, so it goes something like, "Thank you Jesus for my pillow, for Thomas the tank engine, for juice boxes". You get the gist. Well this particular morning, after rattling off a litany of toys, he finishes off with something that brought immediate tears to my eyes. He says, "...and thank you Jesus for baby (the babe's) smiles. They are so cute. I love my baby brother."
I love being a mother.
Anyway, it seems that I may have strayed from my original intentions. As I look back on a year of posts, it seems that this is not all about the funny things my kids say or do, but more about me. More about my thoughts, hopes, and other opinions that I want to pass on to my children. Like they don't hear enough about them. ;-)
That's ok. I've evolved. The blog has evolved. I want my kids to know that I'm not just mommy. When they are old enough to read and understand these words, I want them to know that mommy isn't just all about nagging them to wash their hands, or bugging them about their days at school...but that mommy has arbitrary thoughts, irrational fears, imprudent feelings and grandiose hopes. That mommy is, unbeknown to them, HUMAN.
And thanks to everyone who takes time to read this blog. Because really, why do so? I'm not that interesting. :P Most of all, thanks to my mommy friends that read and "talk" with me. You gals keep it real. Keep on keepin' on, mamas.
Although...as I celebrate my "blog-iversary" (I just made that up), I did want to share a memory that I will cherish forever...so I better write it down before I forget.
A month or so ago, I'm driving the kid to preschool. Well, every morning, we say prayers to thank God for all the blessings he brings in our lives. Our usual M.O. is that the kid starts off with a list of things that he is thankful for...it usually includes whatever he is holding in his hands, so it goes something like, "Thank you Jesus for my pillow, for Thomas the tank engine, for juice boxes". You get the gist. Well this particular morning, after rattling off a litany of toys, he finishes off with something that brought immediate tears to my eyes. He says, "...and thank you Jesus for baby (the babe's) smiles. They are so cute. I love my baby brother."
I love being a mother.
Thursday, November 6, 2008
A birth story.
So I've been MIA for a while. And things have happened in my absence...a LOT of things. Just glance over to the picture on the right hand side of this blog. ;-)
The babe was born this past July. And, like his kuya before him, he came with fight in him. But he has filled our lives like I never imagined. I can't tell you what it means to me to see my two sons together. My heart swells with pride and tears fill my eyes. Of course, I am filled with the wonderful hormones of a post partum nature, but still...the mamas out there get me. :P
I guess I owe this blog a birth story. So here goes...
During the first week of July, 2008, I was the crabbiest person I can ever remember being. Remember, I was DONE with being pregnant about 4 or 5 months prior – so you can imagine how I was at 39 weeks. M had the bright idea to start his paternity leave a week before baby was born, so that left us alone together for almost an entire week. We almost killed each other. I swear, it was the stuff that marriage is made of.
Thing of it was, the plan was for a 39-week induction. But the hospital I was to deliver at has a policy of not scheduling inductions unless the mama is over 41 weeks. The OB can call every shift, though, to inquire about bed availability and see if you can get in…it’s like some highly snooty restaurant where the only things on the menu are excruciating pain and epidurals. Anyway, every day that week was an effort in futility, and having never been induced before, I didn’t realize what an emotional roller coaster it was going to be. It’s like I woke up every day to get my game face on…only to realize the game was cancelled. UGH. Finally, though, on Saturday morning, the heavens opened and so did the L&D ward. ALLELUIA!
I went in around 2:00pm and they very leisurely broke my water and started me on a pitocin drip. Interestingly enough, they told me I could have my epidural at any time…weird, because I thought I had to go through some labor before they’d give me an epi, right? Um, apparently not. But for some insane reason, I opted to hold off for a bit. Well, contractions started hard and fast – but they were tolerable. I wasn't sure if they were tolerable because I had grown to tolerate them (i.e. I was stronger) or because compared to the last time, wherein I was unmedicated for much of my labor and ALL of my delivery, these contractions paled in comparison. The contraction monitor had some pretty large spikes in it, though, so the nurse came back and asked me several times if I wasn’t sure I wanted my epidural sooner rather than later. After about an hour, I relented to the drugs, they gave me an epi and I QUICKLY progressed. Anyway, at about 7:00pm I started pushing. Eeesh. Forgot how hard that was. It took some work to get the babe out because he was turned this way and that (he came out, apparently, with his head to the side – ear up). The babe was born an hour and 15 minutes later. Remembering that I pushed with the kid for 3 hours (with no epidural – AY!) the OB commented as I was pushing, “Geez, mama, your boys make you work!” No shit.
Get this – the babe weighed and measured the EXACT same as the kid…7 lbs, 10 ounces and 20.5 inches long.
The post partum stay in the hospital was VERY different this time around. We were at a different hospital, sure, but the combination of M and me being second-time parents (and thus, the teensiest bit more relaxed) and the babe being a newborn who REALLY liked to sleep just made it easier. Good thing too, because I was nursing a VERY bruised tailbone this time around. With the kid, I felt achy all over and all beat up because of the nature of the delivery and a class III tear. While, I felt better overall with the babe's delivery, he kept hitting against my “protruding coccyx” and gave me some good bruising. Dude, a bruised tailbone HURTS and takes a LONG time to heal.
But all in all, I can't complain one bit. The babe is absolutely beautiful and our family feels so much more complete. And let me tell you, the kid is absolutely ENAMORED with his baby brother. He can't get enough of him. It's really quite cute. From the moment he was born, kuya absolutely watched over him. I have to tear them apart. Let's see how long this lasts. ;-)
The babe was born this past July. And, like his kuya before him, he came with fight in him. But he has filled our lives like I never imagined. I can't tell you what it means to me to see my two sons together. My heart swells with pride and tears fill my eyes. Of course, I am filled with the wonderful hormones of a post partum nature, but still...the mamas out there get me. :P
I guess I owe this blog a birth story. So here goes...
During the first week of July, 2008, I was the crabbiest person I can ever remember being. Remember, I was DONE with being pregnant about 4 or 5 months prior – so you can imagine how I was at 39 weeks. M had the bright idea to start his paternity leave a week before baby was born, so that left us alone together for almost an entire week. We almost killed each other. I swear, it was the stuff that marriage is made of.
Thing of it was, the plan was for a 39-week induction. But the hospital I was to deliver at has a policy of not scheduling inductions unless the mama is over 41 weeks. The OB can call every shift, though, to inquire about bed availability and see if you can get in…it’s like some highly snooty restaurant where the only things on the menu are excruciating pain and epidurals. Anyway, every day that week was an effort in futility, and having never been induced before, I didn’t realize what an emotional roller coaster it was going to be. It’s like I woke up every day to get my game face on…only to realize the game was cancelled. UGH. Finally, though, on Saturday morning, the heavens opened and so did the L&D ward. ALLELUIA!
I went in around 2:00pm and they very leisurely broke my water and started me on a pitocin drip. Interestingly enough, they told me I could have my epidural at any time…weird, because I thought I had to go through some labor before they’d give me an epi, right? Um, apparently not. But for some insane reason, I opted to hold off for a bit. Well, contractions started hard and fast – but they were tolerable. I wasn't sure if they were tolerable because I had grown to tolerate them (i.e. I was stronger) or because compared to the last time, wherein I was unmedicated for much of my labor and ALL of my delivery, these contractions paled in comparison. The contraction monitor had some pretty large spikes in it, though, so the nurse came back and asked me several times if I wasn’t sure I wanted my epidural sooner rather than later. After about an hour, I relented to the drugs, they gave me an epi and I QUICKLY progressed. Anyway, at about 7:00pm I started pushing. Eeesh. Forgot how hard that was. It took some work to get the babe out because he was turned this way and that (he came out, apparently, with his head to the side – ear up). The babe was born an hour and 15 minutes later. Remembering that I pushed with the kid for 3 hours (with no epidural – AY!) the OB commented as I was pushing, “Geez, mama, your boys make you work!” No shit.
Get this – the babe weighed and measured the EXACT same as the kid…7 lbs, 10 ounces and 20.5 inches long.
The post partum stay in the hospital was VERY different this time around. We were at a different hospital, sure, but the combination of M and me being second-time parents (and thus, the teensiest bit more relaxed) and the babe being a newborn who REALLY liked to sleep just made it easier. Good thing too, because I was nursing a VERY bruised tailbone this time around. With the kid, I felt achy all over and all beat up because of the nature of the delivery and a class III tear. While, I felt better overall with the babe's delivery, he kept hitting against my “protruding coccyx” and gave me some good bruising. Dude, a bruised tailbone HURTS and takes a LONG time to heal.
But all in all, I can't complain one bit. The babe is absolutely beautiful and our family feels so much more complete. And let me tell you, the kid is absolutely ENAMORED with his baby brother. He can't get enough of him. It's really quite cute. From the moment he was born, kuya absolutely watched over him. I have to tear them apart. Let's see how long this lasts. ;-)
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
In a word...
Electrifying.
That is the flavor of the night. In fact, that has been the flavor, at least for me, for the past 12 months. And if I get to the heart of the matter, that has been the hope for me since 2004.
I had heard of Barack Obama before 2004 – mostly in quips about his name, his status in Congress, what not. But I didn’t know much about the man or his politics. I never really paid attention to a senatorial candidate from Illinois…I guess I didn’t see the need. But in a streaming video from my computer at work, I watched this man deliver the keynote address at the 2004 Democratic National Convention. A convention where the Democratic Party nominated a candidate I could not get behind and because of that, I didn’t even bother to watch the DNC on TV. But sitting at my computer, I watched the keynote speaker and I KNEW there was a candidate I could get behind. Now at the time I first saw this address, I was newly pregnant with my oldest son. Granted, I was bubbling with hormones, but I was overwhelmed with emotion. As I am now on this historic night.
Here are the words that hooked me…4 years and 4 months ago.
“it's not enough for just some of us to prosper. For alongside our famous individualism, there's another ingredient in the American saga. A belief that we are connected as one people. If there's a child on the south side of Chicago who can't read, that matters to me, even if it's not my child. If there's a senior citizen somewhere who can't pay for her prescription and has to choose between medicine and the rent, that makes my life poorer, even if it's not my grandmother. If there's an Arab American family being rounded up without benefit of an attorney or due process, that threatens my civil liberties. It's that fundamental belief -- I am my brother's keeper, I am my sisters' keeper -- that makes this country work. It's what allows us to pursue our individual dreams, yet still come together as a single American family. "E pluribus unum." Out of many, one.”
This is the truth that I hold deep to my heart. This is the EXACT truth that I had decided long ago to pass on to my children. No matter what I do as a mother, if my children grow to adulthood with the value of the importance of their individualism within a GLOBAL community, then I have done my job. As a parent, you determine which values are nearest and dearest to your heart, those that will drive many of your parenting decisions. This has been mine; that my children understand that they are connected to everyone on this earth. That they are respectful of ALL people, no matter their race, their age, their socioeconomic status, and NO MATTER their circumstances. That because they may have plenty – there are PLENTY out there that do not. And that it is their duty, their obligation, to help, to motivate, to DO SOMETHING to ensure that everyone is treated with respect and love. That they must strive to a benevolent life.
President-elect Obama has been my candidate from the very beginning of this presidential race. I will say that I would not have been terribly disappointed in the nomination of Hilary Clinton as the candidate for the presidency. Truth of the matter is I honestly believed that I would see a white woman president before I saw any non-white male in that office. But Hilary Clinton has never electrified me in the way Barack Obama has in speech, in action, and in politics. I have to point out that I have done the research into our President-elect’s politics and I like and agree with some but I disagree with others, but hey, you can’t win them all. But I do believe that overall, his politics will work for the greater good that I believe in.
I will repeat it, tonight I am overwhelmed with emotion. The kid and the babe were not in bed yet when the election was officially called in favor of Barack Obama. I saw what I did not think I would see in my lifetime. But I cannot tell you how much it meant to me to turn to my boys, look them in their eyes, and tell them that ANYTHING was possible for them. And I truly believe that. I never did before. I guess I never really believed that people in this country could or would look at my children and not see their slanted eyes, their dark hair, and the tint to their skin. But Barack Obama GETS THAT. He gets what I spoke about in this post. And to have a president that gets it is so important to me. That consciousness will take our diverse country far. To places we have never seen. I am excited. I am electrified. My sons, I write this because I want you to know and read the hope that I have for our country, for our family, for you.
That is the flavor of the night. In fact, that has been the flavor, at least for me, for the past 12 months. And if I get to the heart of the matter, that has been the hope for me since 2004.
I had heard of Barack Obama before 2004 – mostly in quips about his name, his status in Congress, what not. But I didn’t know much about the man or his politics. I never really paid attention to a senatorial candidate from Illinois…I guess I didn’t see the need. But in a streaming video from my computer at work, I watched this man deliver the keynote address at the 2004 Democratic National Convention. A convention where the Democratic Party nominated a candidate I could not get behind and because of that, I didn’t even bother to watch the DNC on TV. But sitting at my computer, I watched the keynote speaker and I KNEW there was a candidate I could get behind. Now at the time I first saw this address, I was newly pregnant with my oldest son. Granted, I was bubbling with hormones, but I was overwhelmed with emotion. As I am now on this historic night.
Here are the words that hooked me…4 years and 4 months ago.
“it's not enough for just some of us to prosper. For alongside our famous individualism, there's another ingredient in the American saga. A belief that we are connected as one people. If there's a child on the south side of Chicago who can't read, that matters to me, even if it's not my child. If there's a senior citizen somewhere who can't pay for her prescription and has to choose between medicine and the rent, that makes my life poorer, even if it's not my grandmother. If there's an Arab American family being rounded up without benefit of an attorney or due process, that threatens my civil liberties. It's that fundamental belief -- I am my brother's keeper, I am my sisters' keeper -- that makes this country work. It's what allows us to pursue our individual dreams, yet still come together as a single American family. "E pluribus unum." Out of many, one.”
This is the truth that I hold deep to my heart. This is the EXACT truth that I had decided long ago to pass on to my children. No matter what I do as a mother, if my children grow to adulthood with the value of the importance of their individualism within a GLOBAL community, then I have done my job. As a parent, you determine which values are nearest and dearest to your heart, those that will drive many of your parenting decisions. This has been mine; that my children understand that they are connected to everyone on this earth. That they are respectful of ALL people, no matter their race, their age, their socioeconomic status, and NO MATTER their circumstances. That because they may have plenty – there are PLENTY out there that do not. And that it is their duty, their obligation, to help, to motivate, to DO SOMETHING to ensure that everyone is treated with respect and love. That they must strive to a benevolent life.
President-elect Obama has been my candidate from the very beginning of this presidential race. I will say that I would not have been terribly disappointed in the nomination of Hilary Clinton as the candidate for the presidency. Truth of the matter is I honestly believed that I would see a white woman president before I saw any non-white male in that office. But Hilary Clinton has never electrified me in the way Barack Obama has in speech, in action, and in politics. I have to point out that I have done the research into our President-elect’s politics and I like and agree with some but I disagree with others, but hey, you can’t win them all. But I do believe that overall, his politics will work for the greater good that I believe in.
I will repeat it, tonight I am overwhelmed with emotion. The kid and the babe were not in bed yet when the election was officially called in favor of Barack Obama. I saw what I did not think I would see in my lifetime. But I cannot tell you how much it meant to me to turn to my boys, look them in their eyes, and tell them that ANYTHING was possible for them. And I truly believe that. I never did before. I guess I never really believed that people in this country could or would look at my children and not see their slanted eyes, their dark hair, and the tint to their skin. But Barack Obama GETS THAT. He gets what I spoke about in this post. And to have a president that gets it is so important to me. That consciousness will take our diverse country far. To places we have never seen. I am excited. I am electrified. My sons, I write this because I want you to know and read the hope that I have for our country, for our family, for you.
Today is the day...
For me to come back to blogging. I have been lax, I know...four months from my last post? I apologize to my one reader. :P
Today is the day I see history will be made. I am wearing my Obama blue.
I will back later with a more thoughtful post. I am back to work full time now after a 4 month maternity leave and I'm off to a morning meeting...back to the grind.
Today is the day I see history will be made. I am wearing my Obama blue.
I will back later with a more thoughtful post. I am back to work full time now after a 4 month maternity leave and I'm off to a morning meeting...back to the grind.
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