Oh the horror!

Of getting a haircut. The kid HATES getting haircuts. Which is a tad unfortunate because he was born with a TON of hair and his hair grows at the speed of light. He had his first cut at age 10 months, and it's been downhill since then. You should see the sheer terror that fills his eyes as we approach the kiddie salon. Then there is the kicking and screaming. For the entire 8-10 minutes, I've got to hold a vice-like grip on the kid. He gets full-body shakes. Any parent who has taken their kid to the pediatrician to get shots knows what I mean with the full-body shakes.

But interestingly enough, the kid has NO fear of the doctor. In fact, he loves visiting his pediatrician. While he's waiting in the waiting room, he sits and reads the magazines or watches TV. Then when the nurse calls him back, he happily gets up and struts back to the exam room. He marches over to the scale and stands proudly on it, and when the doctor comes into the room he listens and obeys all prompts of, "deep breath", etc. He even sits still and quiet for shots! Then, when it's all over, he waves and tells the pediatrician "Thank You!" and he blows kisses to the nurses!!!! I should ask the pediatrician if he does haircuts.

Anyway, last night we took the kid to get a haircut. I try to hold off as long as possible because I know how much he hates it, but seriously, his hair was so long it was practically covering his eyes. So in we went. Actually, this visit wasn't as bad as previous visits. It only took one of us to hold him down this time. So M's hands were free to take a little video snippet. Here it is. Enjoy...relax.

EDITED: Ok, I had to remove the video because the hosting site is doing some weird things. I'll post a picture soon...

Giving back

In the spirit of giving and as prompted by the kid, I just wanted to post some organizations that I feel do a lot of good in this world. My family has seen incredible blessings, and it only feels right that we should spread the joy.

I love the philosophy behind the Seva Foundation. This rings so true to me, "...compassion is not just about helping those less fortunate than ourselves, it's about the realization that we are all connected as one human family." I love that they have programs centered around sustainability. Not just helping others, but helping others help themselves. One programs that is close to my heart is Healthy Mothers and Babies. Gifts donated in this program go to helping mothers and babies stay safe and healthy by supporting midwifery care in Mayan communities.

Another neat charitable organization is DonorsChoose.org With this organization, you browse through teacher-submitted project proposals for materials or experiences their students need to learn. I love the creativity and passion that these teachers bring to the classroom. And all they need are funds to put their ideas to work...to help students broaden their thinking and experience new things. It's a totally cool idea.

For those of you close to the OC, I'm sure you've heard about Casa. This organization trains community volunteers and to serve as powerful mentors and advocates for Orange County's most severely abused, abandoned and neglected children. It's amazing what a difference one person can make in someone's life. Whenever I read this statistic on their webpage, "On any given day in Orange County, there are nearly 3,000 children who have been removed from their parents' care and placed in out-of-home care due to abuse or neglect.", my heart weeps. These are CHILDREN. These are GOD's GIFTS. But the people at Casa are trying to make sense out of a senseless world.

And one more, a tried and true organization, the American Red Cross. A few months ago, wildfires ravaged much of Southern California. Thousands were left without homes as they watched them burn to the ground. Many lost everything. The American Red Cross worked so quickly and diligently to set up temporary housing for victims and evacuees. It was a huge job, but they were ready for the task. They are a huge organization and have been around forever...and they continue to get it right.

I hope that this Holiday Season finds you and yours with blessings beyond your dreams.

If only he could.

M told me a funny story last week. We've all been feeling under the weather lately (can't seem to kick these darn colds!) and one day last week the kid and M stayed home to just chill. M was trying to put the kid down for a nap so they were both lazily lounging on the bed. The kid had his head on M's chest - and M wasn't wearing a t-shirt. Word of explanation here, like most adult men, M's got hair on his chest. Anyway, the kid is resting his head on M's bare chest and suddenly looks up at M with a disturbed look on his face. While pulling on M's chest hair, he says, "Daddy, this is yucky. Take it off."

Gotta love kids for their honesty. He doesn't like it, he tells you as much.

Stroke of genius

Parenting absolute: you kid is not going to like taking medicine. In fact, your kid will struggle with you practically every time...especially when they get to the age that they are aware of what's going on. A couple of nights ago, the kid was running a fever. I needed to give him Motrin, but wasn't necessarily up for the fight. Enter M. He comes in with the Motrin already measured in the dosage spoon and tells the kid he's got some "vitamin juice". GENIUS! The kid LOVES his flinstone vitamins. With a huge grin on his face, the kid runs to M's outstretched hand and takes the dosage spoon, gulping down the Motrin and exclaiming, "yummy!"

Yee haw. Struggle averted.

Don't worry, I am making sure that the Motrin is WELL out of reach to 2-year-old hands.

Little Triumphs

You know, in the course of any given day, I beat myself up for not being an ideal mom. I don't know what it is, but it's so much easier for me to find the flaws in my parenting than for me to recognize that I *might* be doing an ok job. In fact, I *might* be doing a good job (gasp!). Yesterday, I received a report from the kid's teacher that he bit another kid. A word of explanation here, we've been struggling with the kid's behavior at daycare for the better part of a year now. Right around his second birthday, the biting and pushing were an almost daily occurance...and if any of you are the parent of "that kid", then you know the guilt and heartache we went through. No one wants their kid to be "that kid" and we did everything we could to curb his behavior. I will say, though, that his caregivers and the daycare director have been so wonderful about this. While M and I were cowering in the corner, feeling guilty, trying to blurt out 100 different explanations of what the source of the problem was, and pledging earnestly that we would do everything we could to help stop the behavior, they were so sweet and supportive. Never a negative word left their lips, only positive thoughts and guidance. A lot of it had to do with his inability to communicate effectively, but now that his speech has really come around, we haven't had these problems. Until yesterday. Yesterday was the first time in a long time where we had a biting incident. So of course, I drove home feeling dejected and wondering what, as a parent, I did wrong.

But as we were getting ready for work/school today, I noticed something else in the kid's behavior. He's extremely polite. He says "please" and "thank you" in the proper way and without being prompted. When he climbed into my bed to watch TV while I was getting ready, he said to me, "Miss Spider, please." When I handed him his Eggo waffle he told me, "Thank you!" As we drove to daycare, I sneezed and he immediately said, "Bless you, Mommy!" And, as we were walking down the path into his classroom, he stepped aside so he could pass another parent and child and he looked up at them and said, "Excuse me!" So I smiled. I gotta be doing SOMETHING right, no?

Spreading the Holiday Cheer...

Christmas Cards have been sent out! Woo to the hoo! 

We did 2 different versions. These are both designed by my wonderful friend and most talented graphic artist, Angela. The link to her website is under my faves on this blog, but for good measure, it's pbkisses.com. I had her do 2 cards because I know there are those that are more "traditional" on our Christmas list and would like a more serene picture of the kid than this first one. But here's the first one...it's my favorite because it perfectly sums up what a 2-year-old goes through on a daily basis:



Isn't this the truth? Why are 2-year-olds so dramatic? My god the crying that goes on around here! Oh, the tunnel on your Thomas train configuration fell apart? The heavens are falling! The bag of animal crackers is empty? Oh the humanity! And so it goes. In this particular series, the kid managed to snag himself a HUGE waffle cone of vanilla ice cream. And I mean HUGE. This thing was spilling over. So mommy had to scrape off just the very top...but it still left him with a ton of ice cream AND a waffle cone...as you can see in the pictures. But mommy messed with HIS ice cream cone. So of course, this was cause for some HUGE crocodile tears. The kid sobbed his way through this entire treat. Seriously. The scene was hilarious. He'd take great dramatic breaths in between spoonfuls of vanilla ice cream. The kid could give Susan Lucci a run for her money.

For those on our card list that may appreciate a happier picture, we did these:



Now to the opposite end of the spectrum. A scene rarely experienced around here. But I LOVE this picture of my son. Our photographer friend named Bobby took this one. He's been taking photos of the kid since he was about 4 months old and he really does capture the essence of my child...and the essence of my family. Anyway, I love this picture because it's just so serene. An incredible capture of a kid that's ALWAYS running around. You don't ever see him sitting quietly in an out-of-the-way place. You can even tell by the look on his face that you caught him out-of-element. It cracks me up...and it warms my heart. Great job, Bobby.

Happy Holidays everyone!

My confession...

I'll admit it. I'm not cut out to be a stay-at-home mom. Don't get me wrong, I respect every mom out there for the choices they make in their lives, mostly because I know that those choices are made not for them, but for their children. I don't begrudge stay-at-home moms, in fact, I revere them. I revere them because sometimes I think they are greater women than me, because I know, deep in my heart, that I could not do it. I am weak and need the break that work (and daycare) give me. Over the Thanksgiving holiday, I was home for 3 straight days with the kid...alone. M had to work most of the weekend, so it was all about the kid and me. I'm not going to lie, it was tough. In fact, I couldn't WAIT to get back to work on Monday. This sounds horrible and I feel so guilty about it, but it's the honest truth. It's not that I don't love being with my son. It's just that it's so much work. SO MUCH WORK. Moreso than the hardest thing I ever have to do at my job. This is why I bow down to the much under-appreciated stay-at-home mom. Keep on keepin' on, mamas.

So there are days when I drop the kid off at daycare in the morning with a big hug and a kiss and a "buh-bye honey, mommy loves you!". But then there are days, like this morning, when the heartstrings are pulled and the guilt hits you like a tsunami. The kid has recently taken to singing "This Old Man." He loves it. This morning on the car ride to school, he's singing "This Old Man" in the backseat. So I start singing along with him. He stops suddenly and tells me, "No mommy! Amy helps me sing." Amy is his primary caregiver in his classroom. He loves her, which is great, but even better...he actually listens and obeys her. So he wouldn't sing "This Old Man" with mommy...he wanted to sing it with Amy. Then when we get to school, the kid runs off and starts playing with the toys and his friends in the playyard. He's happy as a clam. As I'm giving Amy a run-down of last night and this morning, the kid runs up to me and tells me, "Ok, bye-bye mommy!" Then he waves his hand and starts pushing my legs so I will leave the yard. I laughed it off, but when I got back in my car to drive to work, I practically lost it. Sigh. Somedays it's ok. And I do mean ok because it's never easy. It's never fu*king easy. But sometimes, it's REALLY hard.

What has daddy been teaching you?

So I'm in the shower this morning and the kid is sitting on my bed watching "Noggin" and eating his Eggo waffle. By the way, when you're a full-time working mom and you've got to get yourself and a 2-year-old ready for the day and out the door, Eggo waffles are your best friend. But I digress.

I climb out of the shower and start brushing my teeth, then I turn around and the kid is standing in front of me holding a bra. He must have fished it from the hamper (or it may have been sitting on top of the hamper as I am not as tidy as I once was) and he just brought it to me. He holds it up and says, "For mommy's boobies." Then he hands me my bra and walks back to bed to continue watching "Wonderpets."

Picture mommy wrapped in a towel with toothbrush in hand and mouth agape. My only response? "Um, thank you honey for being so helpful!"

They pick up on the oddest things, no?

And the Holidays roll on...

Today the kid and I decorated our Christmas tree.  This is the first year that the kid is actually old enough to "get" Christmas, so it was kind of exciting.  A lot of fun, too.  We have an artificial tree that's pre-lit, so all we had to do was put on the ornaments.  Little did I know that this process was going to take 3 times as long as it had in the past.  Only because the kid had to inspect and ask questions about EVERY ornament.

The absolute best moment, though, was when I first opened our ornament box.  As a kid, my mother-in-law had those Hallmark collector's series ornaments for M.  His ornament series are these adorable pressed tin trains.  They really are cute and each one is dated, so we've got the whole set back to 1982 or so.  They are also in immaculate condition because M was meticulous about his stuff when he was a kid.  Too bad that didn't pass on to our kid.  Anyway, I pulled out our ornament box, lifted the lid and the kid sees the set of trains (he LOVES trains.)  He gasps loudly and proclaims in the most dramatic tone, "Oh THANK YOU mommy!"  Then he starts pulling out the trains and heads over to his train table to run them through tunnels and over bridges.  It's really cute that he loves them as much as M loves them.  Although I worry, though, because these trains have survived 25 or so years in perfect condition and they could easily be destroyed in 10 minutes by the kid.

Another cute moment happened when we were hanging our photo ornaments.  I've got those little, dated silver-plated frame ornaments from Pottery Barn.  The basically have a Christmas photo in them for every year of our marriage.  Well, the first one I pull out is from 2005, the kid's first Christmas.  As I show it to the kid, he grabs it and points to everyone in the picture, naming each person.  Then comes the one from last year and he does the same.  He points to each person and says, "Mommy, Daddy, and (the kid)."  Then he comes to an ornament from 2003 and of course, it's just got a picture of M and me.  So the kid looks at it quizzically and says, "Mommy, Daddy...HEY!  Where did (the kid) go?"  I looked at him and told him point blank that Mommy and Daddy existed before he did.  And that made him mad.  Seriously.  About 5 minutes later he was still carrying that frame in his hand.  He shoved it in my face, pointed at the frame and DEMANDED to know where (the kid) was.  Dude, how else do I explain it?  LOL!  The kid expects that the world revolves around him and therefore, nothing existed before him.  Do I have a handful on my hands or what?

So...Holiday cheer continues tomorrow!  M has the day off and is putting up the outdoor lights while the kid and I put together our Gingerbread House.  Wish us luck. 

From the mouths of babes

Ah toddlerspeak.  Seriously, they should offer Phd's in trying to make sense of what your 2 year old is telling you.  Parents of little boys with poor enunciation would gladly pay someone for this service.  The kid is talking a lot now.  And I mean A LOT.  He had a verbal explosion overnight.  And he's not stopping any time soon.

The problem is that we can't always understand what he's saying.  I mean, we eventually get it, but you can tell that he's frustrated at us.  Dude, you should see the looks he gives us.  Like we're complete and utter morons because we can't understand what "washa wa" means.  The bigger problem is when he's trying to say something completely ordinary and benign, but it comes out sounding like a word or phrase that should not be used in polite conversation.  Parents should not teach little boys to identify trucks until they can clearly speak.  The other day we were driving to work/daycare and the kid sees a dump truck pass us on the road.  What does he yell out?  Yup, you guessed it, "Dumb fu*k!"  Nice.  Very nice.

At least that time we were in the car and it was just him and me.  The other day we were in Target and the kid is sitting in the cart.   Out of the blue, he gets super excited and points at something, exclaiming loudly, "Fu*k it, mommy!  Fu*k it!"  Ok, he's really not trying to say "Fu*k it!" but that's distinctly what it sounds like.  And that's exactly what people around me heard.  I have yet to figure out what object sounds like "Fu*k it" as I high-tailed it out of there as soon as I could.  There were giggles from some people, but there were definitely others who sneered at me with a look that unmistakably said, "Nice parenting skills, jackass."  And you know what?  I really, REALLY wanted to actually say, "Fu*k it!" to them.  I hate being judged.

But then there are times when the kid is RIGHT ON.  Take, for example, just the other night at dinnertime.  The kid and I are having the usual struggle.  He's standing on his chair and I'm nagging at him to sit down.  So we're going back and forth arguing and finally, he throws his hands up in the air, tilts his head to the sky and exclaims, "My GOD!"  Note that he says this in the SAME inflection as he has heard so many a time from mommy.  Then he sits himself down from the sheer frustration of it all.  It was like looking in a mirror.  Uh oh.

You know the next thing out of his mouth is going to be, "What's your drama, Heather?"